Old School Myths Are Today’s Facts

By Assata Akil​

Hello everyone! 

Old school ideologies of the roles men and women played in relationships, viewed men being the financial providers and women managing the home and family. Along with the triumphs on laws towards women came a new view of the woman’s role in society: An almost equality to men. While I am thankful for the freedoms I have gained from those that fought for the privilege that I live as a woman, I ponder if imperative ingredients regarding women’s contributions were lost in the fight. When society regarded women equal as men was that the end of the happy marriage?

For the record, I am not blaming the rights of women vs men’s privilege as the decline of marriages. Can we agree that although we should be regarded as equal Women and Men are not naturally designed to have the same roles in society . One is not superior to the other but we are not the same. Men and women have their different strengths and attributes to survive and contribute to this planet. I am aware that all women are not the “nurturing type” and no, all men do not want to grow up and become a provider for a family. Yet we cannot deny that our built in functionalities to the core are structured differently and it seems to support our purposes. When I say core functionalities I mean obvious natural traits such as women carrying breast milk to feed babies and men not needing as much to survive and being born minimalist in a sense. These traits of female vs male qualities that I speak of are also found in other mammals so this fact is beyond the human race.

This article is in no way supporting the old school thought of women resorting to being barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen while their men plunder the earth. this article is a reflection piece on the value of “accepting your role” on the planet. Should women be able to go to war? Yes if they want. Should men be stay at home fathers? If the situation allows. That is not the debate here. I am only bringing light to a social problem of “with many freedoms comes chaos” on the rise that is growing faster than we can control.

Like many others I see that we are having a hard time keeping our families together and remaining happy. Are women feeling the need to take on masculine roles because new age thought lacks support in our society? Back in the day all people had was their community. Is today’s lack of understanding of the benefits of a strong community birthing the new “independent” ideology of today’s woman? At the same time men are speaking to the struggle of dating a “ new age” woman and the negative competition that has them not knowing where they fit as a man. So what are we missing here?

The problem is that we don’t have enough references on what “going back to the basics” looks like in today’s society. Is it practical to apply old school ways of building a marriage to today’s lifestyle? Yes it is and the start is to stop accepting new ways of creating the wheel that don’t work. There is a quote that says “He who does not look back to where he came from will not know where he is going”. The interesting thing about this quote is that there are many like it. Several ancient words of wisdom that lead to looking to your past for guidance. Though we can’t deny some of the benefits of today’s advancements, we can adjust our access to it. Limit our exposure to the anti relationship/marriage way of life. Our society is doing a very good job at erasing and redefining key roles that women and men play in a marriage but the new definitions are destroying families.

I write this article with hopes that it will reach the youth who are trying to figure things out in our new world of no boundaries. Maybe these words can be a lighthouse in the middle of the sea of identities.
Perhaps we can learn a lot of things from the flowers and animals. You never see flowers protesting against bees nor lions arguing over who will stay and watch the cubs or who will go hunt. It appears that the flowers and animals are in sync with the natural law and there is no confusion as they are all in harmony with their preassigned purpose on this planet and understand what to do.

About the writer:

Assata Akil is a World Traveler, Artist, Vlogger and Author of Ear Candy and Petty Cache. Assata lives in the Yucatán with her husband and two beautiful daughters. Next adventure pending.

Instagram: @loveandpuravidaa 

Youtube: Love is the Journey.

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